Respect. There’s a word that’s gotten pretty iffy in recent years.
We all want respect, but I don’t think any of us are born wanting to give it to someone else.
Respect must be earned, that’s why it’s so difficult to give, and to earn. Often people have higher standards for us to earn their respect than we think they should have.
It’s on my mind because I happen to be one of those individuals who gets talked to about respect quite a bit. I also am one of those individuals who is socially unaware a lot. I’ve offended people without knowing it. Sometimes things I don’t find offensive personally end up offending other people. It always ends up coming back to respect and being polite. I’ve never cared that much about being polite aside from being decent to people , and considerate. But when it comes to saying just the right thing and doing just the right things, I’ll admit I’m pretty clueless.
I think it’s because I usually am assessing myself, and I miss the signals other people send sometimes. As I’ve gained confidence I’ve gotten better at reading people, you wouldn’t think those two things would go hand in hand, go figure.
Not to make excuses for myself or anything. I’ll bet some of you have been there. Often it’s easier to pick up on stuff in writing than when it’s happening.
Unfortunately, I’ve found very few people will be understanding of my problem with respect and manners. so if you find people who will, stick with them, and let them help you. That’s my best advice for overcoming this barrier. It is a real barrier too.
Respecting someone means treating them the right way according to their position in life, and in relation to you. You respect an employer one way, an employee another, and your peers still another. It’s best when we’re all humble enough to learn from each other, regardless of our status, but sometimes that doesn’t happen, and respect is what we give each other as human beings. It’s what keeps us functioning as a society.
Btu on a final note, I’ve also dealt with people who were determined to find fault with my behavior no matter what it was, because they have their own personal standard that doesn’t make sense to other people; in that case, I would caution anyone against changing too much. Do the best you can to work with that person, but understand that even if you met their standards, it wouldn’t be worth it. It’s too much based on the superficial.
If anyone has any advice to add to this, go ahead, I need it too. Until next post–Natasha.