Hello fahm, it’s been a hot minute.
Boy do I have a story to tell all of you though.
Last week this Christian went to her first college party (at least it was basically a college party) with my dance classmates.
When I arrived on the scene, all 3 of the guys I knew were already high or slightly inebreiated.
The one girl I knew came high, apparently, but she’s they type you can’t really notice it with, so she was acting pretty normal, just tired and lethargic.
On top of that, the guys were all flirting with us big time.
Well, two of hem are pretty socially awkward, so they didn’t have the best game, the other really has player, f—-boy vives, if you kow what I mean.
You maybe be wondering why I bothered to do to this thing at all, if you’re read my posts at all, you know it’s not really my scene.
I definely wourld recomemen that any Christain who can’t hande peer pressure does not go to one ofthese.
I was asked when I would start drinking at least 4 or 5 times by the same three people, because they apparently had short memories while under the influence…or they were just being annoying.
I’ve never been one to cave into peer pressure, and I wasn’t going to start at a party of total strangers, and people I barely knew, just because I’m legal, thanks. I also drove myself there, which I told them.
I decided to go only to be polite and to not step on the olive branch with people. I’ve been given the sheltered Christian is a snob treatment before in highschool and middle-school and even at college, and I’m sick of people thinking I can’t handle this kind of crap, and that’s why I don’t go.
I’m teling you if I had 10 bucks for every time some idiot has found out I’m a Chrisitan and said soemting along the liens of:
“Oh I don’t think she’s ever heard cussing before.”
[You should have met my dad, girl.]
“You probably don’t know what — is…”
[I’m homeschooled and I watch YouTube, wanna bet?]
“You don’t like gay people right.”
[Personally? I don’t care. Morally, it’s a long story.]
“You should broaden your horizons.”
[Broaden yours first.]
So yeah, I’ve developed a bit of a snarky approach to this over the years.
I mean, Jesus ate with tax collectors, which would be like lawyers or drug lords in the eyes of their public, and harlots, which would be like the LGBTQ and drug community was viewed not that many years ago before Hollywood popularized it, so I think Christians are well within our rights to hang out with worldly people if we feel called to do so.
The apostlate taught us to be “in the world but not of it.”
Paul even said: “I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people— not at all meaning the people of this world who are immoral, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters. In that case you would have to leave this world. But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler. Do not even eat with such people.
What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those outside. “Expel the wicked person from among you.”’ [1 Corinthians 5:9-13]
So yeah, non Christians always give people like me crap for being exclusive, but any Christ who actually studied their bible knows better than to think that, usually. the ones I’ve been around most of my life don’t subscribe to the exclusivity line.
All that said, going to wild parties is probably not a wise practice.
If it had been too crazy, I would have left right off, but as it was mostly just people doing those things, but not pushing it on other or getting really out there (yet anyway) I decided it was okay, for a short time.
I wouldn’t be going to a rave or an orgy or something like that just to show I could.
Paul said “All things are permissible to me, but not all things are helpful.”
If you can keep yourself pure as a Christians, you can do almost anything, short of blatantly forbidden sin. But not all things promote godliness.
Christian can drink alcohol, despite what many say, it’s even suggest to do so by the Bible for illnesses purposes.
But for many Christian with checkered pasts, it’s not a good idea to touch anything that reminds them of that. So they stay off of it.
That choice becomes a trend, and you get denominations that support it, like Baptists.
I have nothing against Baptists, personally, they are often very strong in the word, well founded people.
But I do have an issue with them judging Christian who do not feel it’s necessary to abstain from drinking, (usually Catholics, but some Charismatic denominations also think it’s okay), and say they are unbiblical.
It’s simply not, sorry. Jesus change water into wine.
I know I’ll get hate for saying that if someone who disagree reads it, but I think the Word also cautions us again making something into a sin if it’s not a sin, because it leads to problems like pride and dischord in the church. I’m not willing to make a huge issue out of a fellow believer getting a few drinks once in a while.
But that doesn’t mean I just think we who should all get smashed whenever we want.
I don’t know if anyone cares about my opinion as a laywoman, but assuming you click on this post because you do, he’re my hot take on the use of drugs and alcohol in Christian life.
- Drugs are different.
The Bible identifies drugs as a form of witchcraft, one of the greek words for sorcery include drugs and potions. Because they cause hallucinations and mood change and addiction, much more easily than wine or alcohol do. And are more damaging to your body.
People disagree about what is what. But I know that Christian who’ve gotten off even pot, which many consider hardly even a real drug, and saw spiritual effects even from that. And anything stronger then that is a no brainer really.
Drugs are supposed to be completely off the table for Christians, anything to do with witchcraft is.
In proverbs, the writer spends a bit of time talking about drinking. Warning against being a drunkard (alcoholic) and a fool.
Later her writes that his mother cautioned him not be drunk, but to be sober, as king. That wine if for a troubled man to forget his troubles. [Proverbs 31: 4-7]
In other places, the Bible says not to be drunk with wine, or tempted by it in an unhealthy way.
But Jesus drank wine, and even commanded us to do it as part of communication. Noah drank wine. Paul tells Timothy to drink a little wine for his stomach. Maybe Timothy was having doubts about it being okay also, and Paul was reassuring him.
Throughout history, wine and other alcohol was about the only way to clean really strong bacteria, or aid in sickness as a pain reliever or cleanser. It has some nutrients that are good for you also.
It also could clean water in areas where water couldn’t be relied upon to be clean.
The Word says God gave man wine to make his heart glad. [Psalms 104:15]
All this to say, the Bible doesn’t condemn the use of wine, but it does condemn the abuse of it.
A few drinks at a party, not a huge deal.
Getting black out drunk and making unwise decisions, or realizing on alcohol to make you happy or functional, that is a huge deal.
Or, in my case, drinking when you know you’ll have to drive, and while you’re around guys who already acting kind of sus, is just idiotic.
I’m not a victim blamer, but any woman who does that and gets harassed…well, it’s wrong that they did it, but with all due respect, what did you think they were going to do if they already seemed sleezy and you left yourself wide open.
I won’t judge anyone for being taken in if a guy is really good at acting, but if he’s a dip from the start and you made yourself vulnerable…I just think you have to take some responsibility for what happens.
I know it’s taboo to say that now, but I wouldn’t hand a gun to a murderer in a rage either, guys.
I was talking to a guy at my church the following morning about being in that position, and he was telling me he’s often the same around his friends, the designated driver, and they smoke pot and drink while he’s around, but he doesn’t really mind being the odd one out, they don’t really care, I guess.
It can be awkward.
But in a way, you also can be a witness in your actions.
Some might say that you’re just condoning that behavior.
Well, in my experience, most non-Christians at least know that Christian do not condone drugs and assume that offering them to you is pointless. While I was offered alcohol, no one offered my pot, thank goodness, I hate the smell of weed.
The alcohol thing might depend on whether they know any Catholics, who are more famous for allowing alcohol. A lot of people I know assume Catholics and Protestants are the same, I’ve had to explain the difference multiple times.
So the drinking thing can be hit and miss. I usually just explain honestly that while I don’t condemn it at all times, I drive myself almost everywhere, and I need to be smart.
Also I have alcoholism and addicts on both sides of my family, and I don’t need to push my luck that I might have that gene. If I ever do try that stuff, I want it to be around people who will make sure I am safe and wouldn’t spike my drink or push more on me.
So when it comes to condoning it, most people , at least who are my age, already know we don’t. They might think you’re a hypocrite, but I was quite clear abut my standards, so I doubt it.
In fact, what did happen was my female friend who was there and knew I was sober, asked if I’d take her home, even if it meant leaving early, since her mom didn’t want to drive her.
[Her mom was an idiot to drop her off there at all with a bunch of strangers when she was already buzzed, but I guess that’s just how some parents are.]
One of the guys, probably the nicest one, heard her ask me and asked if I was gonna, and I said yes, I’d rather it be me than a stranger at the party.
He said “You’re a good person.”
I thought, “I think it’s just decent, she’s on my way anyway, and not feeling too good.”
I said “It wouldn’t be the first time.”
I’ve never taken someone home from a wild party, but I’ve driven a classmate to the doctor for an injury and taken a lot of girls home from church or picked them up. So it’s something I try to do when I can. Makes it easier for them if their parent can’t bring them and they want to participate. Id’re that them be at crush than out doing other stuff, which I know a lot of the kids who come to church but aren’t really christian spend their time doing if they aren’t at our events.
And as the girl who grew up not going out to a lot of events because my mom didn’t like going out, I feel bad for people who miss out just because no one will take them.
I know this girl too, and she’s been through a lot of crap, so I wasn’t sure leaving her with guys who were already in super clingy, and any amount of other guys who I knew nothing about, one of of whom was casually tossing a knife in the air most of the time I was there, was smart.
Yes, you read that right, a knife. 🔪
In a way, my presence might have protected her from anything worse in the first place, as one guy was putting an arm around her, but kept looking at me like “whacha gonna do about it?”
I dint say anything, but I was right there, with pepperspray in my purse, though he didn’t know that. No way was I going to this without something.
I don’t bash on men but…some guys are just…so disgusting…
Some girls are too, I’ve actually seen that behavior from plenty of girls, even at Church events, so I’m not sexist about it. I’ve know very polite men, and very skeezy ones. Who hasn’t?
But this bunch of them really were walking stereotypes, you’d almost not believe anyone could be that predictably cliche. Do frickboys think it’s cool to act like this? I don’t know.
Well, basically I had one Mansplainer, one r/nice guy, and one frick boy. It was like a show roster was filled or something.
I could handle the Mansplainer and r/nice guy, just reminded me of my dad really, but the frickboy was too tall and muscular for me to feel 100% confident about taking him if he was aggressive, luckily he stopped just short of that, but let me know, like he was trying to be bad, that he was holding back.
So, I’ve told you the learning part of the experience for me, and why I was glad I came if only for the sake of my girl friend.
But just to leave you all with something funny, want to hear the cheap crap they tried on me in order to…I don’t know I think they were trying to see me flinch, but it was more amusing than scary:
So Frickboy is still trying to sound edgy, but the edgiest this guy really is is college frat playboy geek who might be a harasser if you were drunk enough, but probably is too chicken to try anything if you’re fully late.
But he thinks he’s so cool, you know.
And he starts in, I kid you not, on how bad and wild his family is, and he uses, I’m dead serious, the Disney character Maleficent as an example.
Yeah cause when I think dark and freaky I go to Disney villains, immediately…not the myriad of other crap out there that’s way worse. Though I do dislike that Malificent movie.
Basically this genius’es take on it is that Aurora’s parents were trying to keep the bad stuff out of her life, by not letting Maleficent be around her, but that just made her naive.
And ou hv t let the darkens sin to your life so you understand it.
Well, I, being my fiery, and fully over it self, wasn’t just going to take that from this wannabe edge lord.
I literally shook my finger in a sassy manner and said something like “Boy, you dont know the kind of stuff I’ve seen!”
And of course he and the other idiot were like “Tell us!”
But, you see, the kind of stuff I’d seen would probably traumatize these guys if they experience it, I know it traumatized me for years, until God healed me.
And I have a feeling they would have thought I was either crazy, or else being way too intense.
And I could destroy them either way.
So, I wasn’t going to take that bait. For their own good, I don’t mind talking about it to people who can handle it, but my bet is these posers couldn’t.
Anyone who uses a Disney villain as metaphor for evil to the “sheltered” Christian girl is not ready to face real evil, if you ask me.
And of course you may be thinking “What the heck is she talking about?”
I don’t think I should share all of it here, for the same reason. not everyone is ready to hear stuff.
But a lot of people have witnessed the supernatural up close, like I have.
I’ll try to put this in a not too weird way without mincing matters:
In a nutshell, my dad had a stepmother who was a witch for many years, she later became a Christian and one of the nicest ladies I’ve known.
My dad also was in a cult for 2 years, and suffered the after effects of it for all his life up to this point, as far as I know.
I both few up hearing stories I was not ready to hear from him, and then witnessing the effects of it firsthand.
On top of that I went to church for several years where seeing that kind of thing was literally a weekly occurrence for a long time.
My dad let plenty of bad influences into my life via movies and people who should not have been hanging around us girls, though nothing really ever happen to us, but we saw and hear things.
And outside that, I have cousins who clan to worship the devil, and do drugs, and think having a seance is something to joke about.
And I have many friends who’ve encountered the occult, in numerous ways that would shock the lucky people who have not had that experience.
I really think anyone who thinks this stuff is imaginary has not talked to enough people about it, you can’t make this crap up.
I don’t think I need to go into the details for you to get the picture.
And even if it was imaginary, the idea alone is pretty horrifying and torments many people, and I’ve talked to them about it. Been on the phone with people who are panicking because of it, and done many a prayer intervention to help with it, once with a deaf guy of all things where I did in ASL.
And that’s just my firsthand experience. I’ve read and heard plenty more.
Take all that, and picture me, a veteran in this area, listen to some 20 some twat who’s probably done drugs and voodoo or some crap like that, tell me I should understand darkness better.
I almost laughed in his face. I understand it, boy, you just have no idea what it does to people who aren’t just playing with it like you are.
And as a believer, I make no bones about that. Sorry if someone reading this has a problem with me calling it what it is, but the occult is a foolish thing to play with, there is always a price. Usually depression and anxiety is the fist thing you have, health problem usually follow.
I don’t want to dwell on it, just thinking about it is creepy and I dont like to give the devil too much attention.
And I’m no one of those Christian who rebukes the devil every time I have a problem, and assumes that demons are responsible for everything. Or that all magic in stories is evil. I love Narnia, and other old classics.
I care about symbolism usually. Magic can be used to depict divine things, but our culture has taken to glorifying it because it’s dark, and because it’s evil, and sexualizing it.
It’s all nonsense, People who actually are terrorized by this stuff don’t like it.
Anyway, so yeah, I got a lot of entertainment out of seeing these scrubs trying to frighten me, like they thought I wouldn’t know what they were at. Once you’ve read The Cross and the Switchblade, not a lot fazes you anymore, I can tell you.
But I also pity them.
I’m reminded of how empty the live of my generation can be. We’re expected to be like this. And many of us are foolish enough to get led astray by it.
Sadly, these three guys aren’t even I’d say all that bad for what they are. There’s worse out there. It’s also sad how much they remind me of guys at church that I know.
Wannabe edgy, but really just insecure.
I know it’s tempting to show off how edgy we can be. As a Christian woman who’s been told one too many times by more uptight believers that I shouldn’t like what I like, I don’t like to be put in that same box.
But I also know as a member of the body, I’m called on to be considerate of my brothers and sisters who have more sensitive consciences. I get it. I once did too. And I dont care if they don’t like that stuff, as long as they step off of me, if it’s not forbidden, then I’m going to have to work it out with God, not you.
If I am doing something that is forbidden, please tell me.
One problem though, before I end, I do have to admit.
Things like sexual content, and occultic content started bothering me a lot less when I read more stuff and watched more that allowed for it. It was no longer shocking.
Usually it just take reorienting myself through the Word or a good message to snap out of it, but if I go without that too long, I get dulled to it.
In some ways, I can’t avoid exposure to all that. I’d see it even if I didn’t want to.
But there are things I can’t control it’s tempting to let them slide.
It hasn’t made me engage in sexual or occultic activity, but it has made it seem less of a problem.
While it’s good that I am fazed less by people who do those things, the idea of the things themselves should still be grotesque to me.
It is if I really think about it, but the trick of media is to get you to see something in semi positive light, until you no longer feel triggered by it, and then to get you to either do it, or at least laugh at it and be too uncertain to tell anyone else the truth about it.
Again, all things are permissible, but not all things are helpful, or edifying.
I think I’ll leave it at that.
Until next time, stay honest, and don’t do drugs–Natasha